7 menopause mistakes you might be making


Eileen Durward
@EileenDurward
Ask Eileen


22 July 2019

Today's topic

Today on A.Vogel Talks Menopause, I'm going to be talking about seven menopause mistakes that you may be making as you go through the menopause.

7 menopause mistakes

The problem for us going through menopause is that life is really busy. We are really busy. As women today, we've got jobs, we've possibly got family and we may be looking after elderly relatives. So, all the good intentions we have, as in, "I'm going to look after myself really well during the menopause. I'm going to rest. I'm going to eat well," very often go out the window.

So, what I thought I'd do today is look at some of the really basic things that we may or may not be doing that can have a huge impact on how we feel as we go through the menopause.

1. Forgetting the basics

So, number one is basically your self-care tips - these are the basics. Like, are you drinking enough water? Honestly, water is one of the best things for the menopause. It's not very exciting but it's really important to have on a daily basis. So, are you drinking that one and a half to two litres of water a day? (It needs to be plain water, not fizzy water!)

If you want it flavoured, it needs to be natural flavourings such as lemon, lime, or a little bit of ginger or cucumber, not these artificially-flavoured ones which can make things like hot flushes worse as well. And watch how much tea, coffee, fizzy drinks, and fruit juices you're drinking because they can make your symptoms worse. Water really is the best drink in the menopause!

Also, look at your diet. Are you still getting plenty of portions of fruits and veg on a daily basis? Are you eating well? Are you eating regularly?

If we're busy, we can end up skipping meals and, if we don't have snacks, our blood sugars will plummet and that can trigger a whole raft of menopause symptoms, maybe an hour or so later. So, just make sure that you're eating well and eating regularly.

Are you getting enough rest? Are you having those 30 minutes of 'me' time a day? I'm so pleased about this - more research is coming up showing that symptoms, like hot flushes and night sweats especially, can be reduced quite quickly just by spending 30 minutes a day doing some mindfulness. It's really simple and those 30 minutes are really worth their weight in gold for you as you go through the menopause.
Next, look at your exercise. Are you getting enough? I know there are those of you who are really fatigued and, if you're getting joint aches and pains, it can be very difficult to motivate yourself. In these circumstances, just try and keep as active as you can, even if it's only a five-minute walk, two or three times a day. That can be enough just to keep things going until your symptoms resolve.

Plus, remember to get your sleep. And I know, again, sleep can be disrupted by flushes and sweats, and all the emotional angst that comes with the menopause, but it's important to try and get to bed early. There are a number of menopausal women I know who are so busy, they don't end up getting to bed until 12am or 1am in the morning - that is not going to help you go through the menopause.

So, these things are very basic but, as I say, we very often forget about them over time.

2. Just putting up with your symptoms

There are a number of women who come to us and they've been having symptoms for years but they've been doing nothing about them, so do look into them.

If you're getting symptoms regularly, do a little bit of research online. See if using natural remedies can help - try some of them just to see if they work. If your symptoms are really debilitating, go and see your doctor because, sometimes, it's something really simple that will make such a difference and will just make you feel that much better as you go through the menopause.

3. Blaming things on getting older

You know, we have a bad habit of saying, "Oh, my joints ache. It must be because I'm middle-aged". Weight gain is another one that we tend to blame on getting older. And the fogginess and the forgetfulness as well – it's, "Oh, nothing to do with the menopause".

Very often, it actually can be the menopause. We know that joint aches and pains are really common ones that very often don't get picked up as menopausal. This situation is a bit of a double-sided coin in a way because, here we are, blaming things on getting older when it may, in fact, be due to the menopause - so just bear these symptoms in mind if they're happening to you.

4. Blaming everything on the menopause

Your symptoms may not just be about getting older. The other side of the coin is blaming everything on the menopause and that's not necessarily the case either. There are certain health ailments that pop up during the menopause, and that may be exaggerated by the menopause, but they are individual symptoms.

Blaming the menopause for these symptoms won't help. And the normal menopause remedies, very often, won't help for these because it's not hormone-based. So, the problem can be things like your low iron, your low thyroid function, your low vitamin D, your low B12, and diabetes is another one as well. These can all trigger menopause-like symptoms.

Remember, we have a check sheet for if you need to go to the doctor - there will be a link to this. You can tick all the symptoms that you're getting and that can give the doctor a better idea of what may be going on with you, so it's certainly something to bear in mind.

5. Not telling people you're in the menopause

You know, there is still a stigma about the menopause. It can be very embarrassing and maybe you don't want to tell the whole world. But, if you are having problems, your family might be worried about you - we get families, we get partners, we get daughters and we get sisters contacting us because they are so worried about their family member, not knowing what's going on. So try and explain to them that, you know, you're going through the menopause, that it can throw things up and you might not feel particularly great.

Maybe tell people at work as well. There's a big explosion going on in the workplace which is absolutely fabulous. More and more organisations, especially the big employers, are realising just how many of their employees are going through the menopause.

So, the more of you who get in touch with your HR department and say, "I would like some help going through the menopause," the easier it will be for everybody else. And, again, changing certain, simple things at work can make a great deal of difference to your comfort levels when you're going to work on a daily basis. So, try and just be that little bit more open about it, if you can.

6. Not putting yourself first

Number six (again, this ties to number one in a way) is not putting yourself first. A number of women come to me who are going through the menopause, and I say, "Get your 30 minutes 'me' time," and they say, "I don't have time. I'm too busy. I have to look after everybody else".

This is the point in your life where you need to look after yourself if you're going to be able to cope with the menopause and care about everybody else, too. So, as I said before, that little bit of extra self-care, that 30 minutes of 'me' time, can make a huge difference as you go right through the menopause.

So, please don't throw that one out. Really make an effort to have that time to yourself every single day.

7. Thinking you're going crazy!

A number of women contact me and say, "I think I'm going mad. All these symptoms are happening to me" - maybe other people are not talking about it with them, and they really do think they're going mad. Maybe they're going to the doctor's and the doctor is not picking up that what they're experiencing is a menopause symptom as well.

So, no, you're not going mad. These emotional feelings and the physical symptoms are very often tied in with the whole menopause process. And, very often, just realising that you're okay and that you're going to get through it can make a huge amount of difference to your confidence, and also your positivity, as you're going through the menopause.

So, I hope this has been of help. These are very simple things but, as I said before, very often we tend to forget about them as we focus on things that are maybe a little bit more complex. If any of you out there have any other tips to help all our other ladies going through the menopause, then please let us know – we'd love to hear from you.

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